Near You Always
by Yva J
Summary: On Susan's wedding day, Lucy is overcome with jealousy and wonders if romance is in the cards for her. TxL. Rewrite submitted May 1, 2006.


_a/n: As of today, May 1, 2006, this story has been updated and edited to the very best of my abilities. If you've read the first draft, then you have my thanks, if you left a review, you get a dozen thin mint cookies._

_This second draft has been more fine tuned and hopefully the grammatical and spelling mistakes are gone. I am quite proud of this story, and I hope that if you haven't read it, that you will give it a chance._

_Enjoy, and yes it was inspired and based on a song that carries the same title, by Jewel. It was written for a friend in Live Journal, and is being shared with you here. I did make some small additions to it. I hope you will enjoy it.  
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**Near You Always**

By: Yva J.

Lucy Pevensie spun around the room, her eyes shining somewhat as the folds of her dress wafted up around her. Anyone watching might have compared the young queen as a flower bursting from the confines of its bud, as that was how she looked. Yet the actual fact of the matter was that she felt more like a little girl than anything else. Her arms were swaying around her and the feeling of freedom seemed to encompass her. In fact, as she danced, she could feel herself engulfed in the silence, which seemed to fill the room completely. 

The music that was playing was faint, somehow mixed with the breeze that was wafting through her window and ruffling her hair. Perhaps this soothing music that filled her ears had come from the grand ballroom of Cair Paravel. Both the windows to the ballroom as well as the one to her chamber had been opened. The overall soothing sounds of the melodies seemed to fill her heart and let her spirit take flight.

In this state, she never thought about what she was doing or why. Instead, she reflected on the fact that some of the happiest times of the day were when she could be alone. She continued to spin around, her hair and dress seeming to have a mind of their own. The soft breeze made her look almost the part of a winged fairy or a happily dancing nymph. All that seemed to be missing was a large bonfire or a few musical fauns. She did not wish for company, however, in fact, she would have died of embarrassment if someone were to come into the room and observe what she was doing.

No one else truly knew how much she liked to twirl about, but it was a feeling unlike any other to her. It was the moments such as these where she allowed that little girl who dwelled inside of her the freedom to simply be. Although she loved this feeling, she still wished that the others would somehow start to see her as a grown woman as opposed to a child. Her elder siblings particularly always seemed to regard her as though she was a child instead of a grown woman.

Although she had grown physically, no one seemed to consciously regard her as a grown queen of Narnia. She was embarrassed by the fact that she had never been kissed, although she was nearly nineteen years of age. She had never really known or experienced this thing called romantic love. That is to say that she was not used to the emotion being reciprocated. Regardless of her inexperience, she knew that she would not have known how to react to it even if it came to pass.

Of course, the potential suitors in question had often kissed her cheek, or laid a gentle kiss on her hand. The thought of actually kissing them as she had seen Susan do completely made her stomach turn. No matter how wealthy and well groomed these princes were; she simply could not see herself involved with or married to any of them.

Sighing, she shook her head as she curled her lip unconsciously. This always seemed to happen when she contemplated her almost non-existent love life.

Actually, this was not entirely true.

Lucy Pevensie was in love, but no one in the entire castle knew whom it was she secretly lusted after. She thought of him constantly; his gentle smile, loving eyes, and inner strength literally filling her mind every hour. She longed for him to come to her and take her in his arms and kiss her passionately, but that never happened. In fact, when she would see him, a kiss to her hand or forehead was all she would experience.

The secret wanton Lucy wanted nothing more than to have him wrap his arms around her and feel his hands gently wandering over her. She imagined his soft fingertips as they would lavish her body and bring a new life into her world.

This was a dream that she had wished for and it had been with her for such a long time. It was the wish she had when she had blown out the candles on her last birthday cake. The same desire was secretly scrawled out in a letter addressed to Father Christmas that previous year. Today, the letter was tucked amidst the pages of her diary because she had not found the courage to send it. These emotions were too private. In the recesses of her heart, she knew that the fear of rejection was too great.

The fantasies she had about the one she loved seemed her sole company, and perhaps that was the reason she liked to be alone. She could daydream of having him ravish her with kisses and make her yearn for a thousand more. She could visualize him wrapping her securely in his arms and dancing with her, his strong lead ushering her across an empty and silent room. She longed to hear him speak those three simple words, 'I love you', and let them touch the very depths of her soul.

As much as she yearned for these things to come about, it had not happened and she feared that it probably never would.

Oddly enough, she had danced with him a thousand times before that day, but that was merely when they had shared a friendship. The dance she imagined would not be the same. Everything would change for them; the song itself would be different. It was a melody of love that carried them far away to a place where only the two of them would exist. It was love, the purest and truest that could exist.

Lucy continued to dance, her body moving to the rhythm and in her mind she willed him to be with her and share in that dance.

Seconds later, she was abruptly tossed out of her daydream when a loud crash was heard emerging from outside. She lowered her arms, rushed over to the window, and looked out into the courtyard below.

There, standing amidst a group of dryads, her brother Edmund was trying to coordinate the flower baskets and the gifts their subjects had brought for her sister and her groom. Sighing, Lucy quietly closed the window and took a deep breath.

Abruptly her ears stopped detecting the music and she no longer wanted to dance. Her happy mood was suddenly gone; the images that she concocted in her mind had vanished. As she stood alone in the middle of her room, she could feel a stray tear as it crept out from beneath her eye and left a trail of moisture along the contours of her face.

"Tumnus…" she mumbled the name of her dearest friend as she wrapped her arms around herself. Instead of happiness at the soft utterances of his name, she was suddenly overcome with a sense of bitter loneliness. In this place, she knew that her wishes and reality were not the same.

The youngest queen of Narnia had always felt as though she was bonded by loyalty and obligation to do what was expected of her. She was supposed to meet suitors and fall in love with one of them. How could she make everyone else understand that she was deeply in love with someone that they would deem as a commoner? Worse still, the one who had stolen her heart long ago did not even seem to realize it.

His eyes were a merry blue and his hair like strands of coiled gold that shone in the sun's purest light. Oh how she loved him, yet he did not see her in this way, he did not know how much she cared for him. She wanted nothing more than to be with him, have him love her, and know that he was hers, and hers alone.

Lucy could still remember the days that had passed and how she had seen her sister and the one she called her fiancé sneaking through the halls of Cair Paravel. She had watched as Susan and her betrothed had been caught giggling as though they had eaten an entire pantry full of sweets.

They were so happy; they had found one another. They had set a wedding day and announced to an entire kingdom that they would wed.

What about me? Lucy asked herself almost constantly. I have not found anyone who would wish to share my days with me. The problem must lie with me. If only I could make him aware of what dwelled in my heart.

She looked down at herself, the dark rose-colored dress hanging limply from her shoulders and down over her body. Her arms were crossed over her chest, her hands holding onto her forearms. She resented the feelings that filled her; they left her feeling heavy and burdened. It was as though her heart was going to break apart beneath the weight of the fears that consumed her.

Instead of remaining in the center of the room, she slowly walked over to the dressing table in one corner of her chamber. It was no longer time for childish antics or silly thoughts. Instead, it was time for her to get ready for the wedding. The last thing she needed was to appear unkempt and have her sister shake her head in disapproval. She bit down on her lip as she looked into the mirror, her reflection pale and lifeless.

She shook her head as she reached for her date book. She had casually opened it to today's date and left it on her vanity table instead of on the writing desk.

With her head still lowered, she regarded the neatly scrawled writing that was literally jumping out and slapping her across the face. It was Susan's wedding day, and she knew that the whole court would be present. Even he would be in attendance, the only one she ever loved, and yet his bare chest covered only by a green and gold scarf would be the greatest temptation known to her. How could she possibly not notice the strong muscular chest that was beneath the folds of the now familiar woolen muffler?

She tried with all her might to conceal the fact that he made her body feel something she never knew existed. From within the folds of her dress, she could feel a tingling sensation beginning to curse through her, a longing that she could not explain away. Her thoughts were only on him and try as she might, there was no way to dismiss the fact that he had become an obsession to her.

As she flipped through the pages of her date book, she found the white and dark pink colored envelope that held the wedding invitation. As she stared down at it, a bubble of jealousy started to well uncontrollably within her.

Susan was always happy with her suitors, and Lucy often pondered if her sister could truly be happy with just one. It was a known fact that the eldest Daughter of Eve had once enjoyed flirting; sometimes even teasingly flirting with the one Lucy loved. This became a problem, and she often wondered why it was that Susan chose to play with the emotions of others in this way.

This was something that she never had the courage to do. I'm different, she concluded sadly to herself. As her thoughts drifted, her gaze came to rest on a small picture that was sitting on one corner of her vanity table. The golden frame shimmered and reflected the light that was filtering into the room from outside.

She shook her head as she picked up the object and hugged it tightly to her chest. "He doesn't even know I exist," she mumbled sadly to herself as she gingerly stroked the framed picture lovingly.

"Who doesn't?" A voice emerged. Shocked by this abrupt recognition that she was not alone, she inhaled sharply. The framed picture slipped from her fingers and fell to the ground, the glass shattering into pieces.

As she turned around, she found herself looking into the familiar blue eyes that she had grown to love. Before she could even utter a sound, he spoke. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to startle you." His gaze shifted and he found himself looking down at the broken glass and the small photograph that lay on the floor. When he saw his face amidst the glass pieces, he took a step towards her.

"Mr. Tumnus," she began, her voice catching in her throat as she reached down in order to retrieve it.

"No, my queen," he managed as he took both of her hands in his. This, she knew was not an act of love, but instead had stopped her from completing her intended action.

Lucy stared for several moments down at both of their hands. The tears began to well beneath her eyes as she regarded their intertwined fingers.

"Is everything alright?" He asked when she did not speak.

"I guess," she whispered. "Susan's getting married…"

"Yes," he began as he studied her face. The first thing he noticed was that she had tears brimming beneath her eyes and was trying without success at blinking them away. "Your Majesty, something tells me that the tears in your eyes are not because of the wedding."

Lucy lowered her head, as the tears slipped down over her face and landed where their hands were joined. Instead of speaking, she bit down on her lip and shook her head. There was no way that she could lie to him. It was also impossible for her to tell him that she was hopelessly in love with him.

"What is it?" He asked softly upon feeling the moistness against his hands. "Lucy," he spoke her given name and she raised her head slowly. She was surprised at hearing him speak using her given name instead of some fancy title. Yet, in the recesses of her heart, she hoped and prayed that he had done so as a term of endearment.

"Y-you don't call me that anymore," she whispered.

"It's not appropriate, I fear," he said, but watched as her tears continued to fall. Eventually, he reached over and touched her face. "Please tell me, whatever is the matter?"

She swallowed as she licked her lips unconsciously and tried to look up at him. With everything inside her, she found the courage to raise her head. As the images and ideas from her daydreams flashed through her mind, she could suddenly feel fantasy and reality merging. As this happened, she leaned towards him and pressed her lips to his.

The next thing that happened sent her reeling. The faun abruptly pushed her away and spoke, his voice laced in confusion. "Lucy…" he managed with surprise. "You mustn't."

As the reality of the moment hit, her face flushed and she turned away; the heartbreak caused by his rejection now evident. She had given her first kiss to the one she loved, but now wished that she had not taken such a risk. Feeling sheepish and small, she carefully pulled her hand out of his hold and backed away from him. As their contact broke, she could feel the coldness of the room filling her.

For his part, the faun managed to walk slowly towards the door as Lucy found the courage to turn around. "I'm sorry," she whispered, her head lowering, thus causing him to stop and turn around. "I don't know what came over me. Forgive me, Mr. Tumnus, it won't happen again."

Dejected, she walked slowly over to the writing table and allowed her weight to drop onto the chair. Hiding her face against her arms, she began to weep openly, her soft sobs filling the now silent and empty room. She no longer cared if he was present or had left; all she cared about was releasing the humiliation she carried.

Thinking he had left the room, she continued to speak, her repeated words a soft whimper. "I'm sorry…"

Her body continued to tremble as her heart felt as though it would shatter in the same way the picture had done only moments before.

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As he reached the door leading outside of Lucy's chamber, Tumnus was holding his fingertips against his lips. She had actually kissed him, her lips feeling so good against his, but his surprise had broken the moment. Now, he stood, his back to the door and he listened to the sounds of her soft sobs filling his ears. His thoughts returned to the kiss that she had given him and he felt his cheeks take on a reddish hue.

It was at that moment that he realized that there was no way for him to simply walk out of that room. Logic had told him to leave, but his emotions had won out. They made him turn around and look at her.

He stared for several moments, the young woman broken hearted and alone. Her body was now hunched over the desk, her arms folded before her and pillowing her face. It was at that moment when he no longer saw her as a queen. Instead, she was a vulnerable woman who had, in her own way, told him she cared. She was still Lucy, his Lucy, the one he would freely give his life to protect. She was the one whose tears seemed to touch him straight at the core of his being.

How he loved her. There had been several moments when he wished that it had been possible for him to tell her just how much. He had watched her grow from being a child into a beautiful woman practically overnight. He could also feel a secret physical longing for her beginning to literally overwhelm him. Up to this moment, he had managed to completely conceal said impulses. She was so lovely, how could he not notice her? Even a reserved and well-mannered faun such as himself had limits.

He remembered all those times that he had seen her and how excitement had filled his every cell. The way she walked and carried herself was so alluring. It was no wonder men secretly wished to gain her favor. They wanted nothing more than her undivided attention, yet she seemed so uninterested in this aspect of courtly life.

As he continued to stare at her, he smiled. He recalled how something as simple as the folds of her dress seemed to act as a form of temptation. Something as simple as the wind would force her clothing to outline her silhouette and the harder it blew, the less intact his resolve had become. His feelings became a torrent of emotion and longing which he quickly was losing control of.

Tumnus knew far more about the young queen than any of the suitors who came calling did. He also tried diligently at keeping his knowledge at bay. There was, however, no question in mind, his lovely Lucy had become a woman.

The day Susan had announced her intention to wed Prince Georges, Lucy had listened to the news and quickly excused herself from the dining hall. Tumnus, being the queen's best friend, followed and found her out in the corridor crying. Instead of approaching her immediately, he remained concealed in the shadows only to draw nearer after she had dried her tears.

"You are sad that your sister is getting married?" He had asked her softly, his voice etched with concern.

"No, I'm quite happy for her actually," Lucy responded, but she did not offer any further information. In fact, she seemed to have altered her stance in a matter of moments. Tumnus was left to ponder what it was that made her response seem so hard to believe.

Upon hearing her response, Tumnus had nodded and offered her his arm. "Shall I escort you back to the dining hall, or would you prefer to return to your quarters?" He asked formally.

She had accepted his offer to return with him to the table, but he could not help but recall how she had held his arm, her fingernails digging into the skin. Later, after he had returned to his small room, he had noticed that there were tiny indentures in the skin.

Ever since that night, Tumnus had started to notice a change in her and he concluded that he wedding preparations must be the cause. When the news of the set date had been disclosed, she had done everything she could to conceal her feelings about it. 'Valiant' seemed to fit everything about her, but even that had started to wane. Tumnus had seen it coming though, but never spoke of it.

For whatever reason, she had become quieter and even more contemplative. Now, the faun knew that he wanted his old Lucy back.

Regardless of these changes, he knew that he truly loved her. That kiss had sparked a new hope inside of him that was both dangerous and exciting. Realistically, he knew that he was nothing more than a simple faun with a stack of books and a cave near the edge of the world. He knew that she deserved much more than that, but he did not have much to offer. What would life with me be in comparison to living in a castle and having so many loyal subjects? He asked himself all the while knowing that night and day between the two.

He remembered the philosophical statements that his father had often told him when he was just a little faun. "The true sign of love that is shared between two individuals is determined by the willingness to let go."

These particular words of wisdom had been taught from an early age on. He had seen his father live these words. He had even witnessed his father making that sacrifice for the love of his mother. These words would always leave Tumnus living in nothing more than a lonely and isolated world. He had let go of so much, but nothing had returned to him; nothing, that is except for Lucy.

He swallowed as he remembered the brave Daughter of Eve and how she had returned to see him after their first meeting. She kept coming back to him. Even after she had kissed him, her presence in this room was showing him that she was not going anywhere.

As he felt the tears streaming down over his face, he was brought back to the moment and watched as the young queen wept. Her head was still buried against her arms, her shoulders shaking with absolute humiliation.

After several moments, he turned back towards the door and gently turned the key in the lock, which would close them inside the room. He knew that no matter what would happen, this was meant to be. He knew in the recesses of his being that Lucy had the courage to do what he wished he could have done. A small smile tugged at his lips as he started to walk slowly towards her.

When he reached her, he leaned over and wound his arms around her from behind. For an instant, he could feel her body stiffening upon sensing this hold on her. "Lucy, don't be afraid," he whispered softly, and immediately felt her relax from beneath his touch.

He watched as she ungracefully wiped the back of her hand over her face and slowly turned around in order to look up at him. The first thing he noticed was that her eyes were red and puffy. Without even thinking about what he was doing, he gently helped her to her feet and wordlessly took her in his embrace.

Her face immediately pressed up against his red scarf, her cheeks now sore and streaked with tears. He watched as she pressed her face against him, the back of her head all that he could see. Seconds later, she backed away, lowered her gaze, and was staring down at the floor.

When she did not stop crying, he gently took her face in his hands and tipped it up so that he could behold her. With his thumbs, he carefully wiped the tears from her cheeks and smeared them away. "Don't cry," he soothed gently. "It breaks my heart to see you so unhappy."

Lucy bit down on her lip, but the tears continued fall, he moisture from them meshing against his fingers. "I'm sorry," she whimpered.

"No, it is not you who should apologize, dearest Lucy," he whispered as he continued to rub the remaining tears gently from her face. "Perhaps I ought to apologize to you for creating such a terrible misunderstanding."

She shook her head unwilling or unable to speak.

Eventually, he swallowed and took the incentive, this time his voice trembled. "Lucy, I don't think you even realize the power you hold over me. When you look at me in the way that you do, there is something inside of me that crumbles. At the very same moment, something aches in my soul for you. It is sadly, something that I know I cannot ever have, but it remains and I long for it from the depths of my being."

"W-what are you saying?" She whispered. "Is that a fancy way of saying that you love me?" These words emerged hopeful, their cadence filling the faun's ears. As soon as she realized that his hands were still gently pressed against either side of her face, she abruptly covered them with her own.

It was obvious that she would not release his hands for fear that he would run away from her. Yet, looking at him, somehow she realized that neither of them seemed willing to. She licked her lips slowly, all the while realizing that their mouths were only inches apart.

He continued to stroke her face, his fingers soft against the skin. "Lucy, I want you to be with me always, to stay by my side…" His voice trailed as he lowered his head, his eyes closing. They opened abruptly and he ceased his action when he heard her insecure response.

"You do?"

"Yes, but don't you see? It's wrong of me to say such things. It is wrong to feel such things. It's so dreadfully wrong," he could feel the tears streaming down over his face. "When you kissed me just now, I wanted to run away because I knew that deep in my soul I would want more and more. I could never have asked for it, not ever. By Aslan, it is as though there exists a thirst inside of me cannot ever be quenched and that thirst is for you."

"Tumnus…" she whispered his name, this time without the general formalities that she used when addressing him. Her body wavered and she collapsed in his arms. "…I don't care about any of that, I love you." She raised her head and looked into his eyes. "Please, just promise me you'll stay with me."

The faun's eyes widened upon hearing this confession of love. He gently lowered his hands from her face so that he could wind them around her. After some time had passed, she suddenly felt his hands once more moving towards her face. As soon as he held either side of her face in his hands, he tipped up her chin, and brought her lips closer to his own.

As their lips met, she frantically wound her arms around him and allowed her lips to part. Suddenly, she could feel his soft velvet-like tongue purging into the recesses of her mouth. As it wound around hers, a soft moan emerged from him and his arms once more wrapped around her lithe body, the hold tightening.

Tumnus, her thoughts raced as their kiss became deeper and even more passionate. She buried her hands in his golden locks of hair.

He lowered his hand and used it to cradle the back of her head as though she was an infant. "Lucy…" he whispered her name between passionate kisses. His hands now roamed across her back, now seeking the zipper to her dress. Neither of them said anything further, one kiss had already melted away to another. As she felt his hands beginning to lower the zipper, Lucy's hands began to roam along his back at will.

As her fingers inched closer and closer to his tail, he abruptly lowered his arms and pulled away from her. "I'm sorry, Lucy, but I-I-I cannot do this," he stammered, the contact between them now broken. "I'm frightened."

She looked at him and immediately noticed that his blue eyes were now filled with shyness. Trying to ignore that, she spoke. "Why?"

He shook his head. "I-I don't know. I want to be with you, Lucy. I want to hold you, and feel you near me. I'm so afraid of what would happen if I were to allow myself to let go."

Slowly, she raised her hands and touched both side of his face. "You don't have to be afraid, Tumnus. I already know that we're different. Is that why you're afraid?"

The faun looked down at himself and nodded. "I am not worthy enough for a queen, Lucy. Don't you understand?"

"No, I don't understand," she whispered, her lower lip trembling. For a moment, he could see the overwhelming stubbornness that emanated her. "Does it mean anything to you that I love you? I have been in love with you for over a year."

"But Lucy, you deserve more," he objected. "You should have far more than what I am able to give. You are worthy of a prince or a knight."

"If I wanted anyone like that, don't you think I would have gone and gotten myself engaged to one?" She asked. "I don't mean to sound arrogant, but if I had said the word, I could be getting married today just like my sister. But, I don't want any of them, I just want you because you're the one I love."

He started to turn away from her, but she reached out and grabbed the end of his scarf. He stopped abruptly, but eventually turned around and faced her. "Lucy."

"No, you're not going to run away from me," she said softly, her voice cracking as she continued to hold the end of the scarf, her fingers griping it so hard that her knuckles were white. "I won't let you go, not like this." As he started to back up, she began to pull on the end until the faun faltered and his body eventually stumbled back into her arms.

"You may think me to be crazy, but I can't bear this anymore," she began to speak, her voice cracking. "My sister's getting married today and I am still alone. She's had more suitors than one could count and I have watched one after the other come and go. Yet, here I sit day after day lonely and thinking how happy it would make me to hear someone speak undying words of devotion to me." She tried to blink back the tears but could not. Instead, she released the hold on his scarf and then walked over to her diary, opened it, and searched between the pages until she found a separate piece of paper. She pulled it out and closed the book before returning to his side. As soon as she was next to him, she pressed it into the faun's hand.

"Read this, and if you still want to run away afterwards, then there's the door," she whispered bravely. "I wrote it right after my eighteenth birthday, but never found the courage to send it."

Tumnus looked at her, his eyes filled with sadness. Even now, she was emanating courage. He unfolded the paper and began to read:

_Dear Father Christmas,_

_I know I haven't written you since I was a child, but I want to write and ask you to help me. For the longest time, I have lived in this castle and have done what I felt should be done for the sake of Narnia. I have followed my heart and have listened to the words of others when it came to being a good and noble Queen. Today I have found myself unable to go on. There is something inside of me that longs for something more. There is a longing in me for something different than the paths my siblings have chosen._

_Since my first moments in Narnia, I have felt different than the others, set apart from them somehow. I always believed in Narnia, even as a child, but perhaps the one that made me believe more than anyone, even Aslan, was Mr. Tumnus._

_From the first moment we met, there was something in him that understood me in ways that I cannot describe. It was as though he had become my other half. I had spent my life feeling like half a person only to find him and discover that he is my whole. Whenever we are together, it feels like I have nothing to fear, that my life and heart are in harmony. I have never felt that way with anyone else. I fear that if he were to know that I love him more than myself, more than my life, then he would disappear from my life. I don't want to open my eyes and discover that he is gone or that I had caused our friendship to be over._

_I cannot change how I feel about him, nor do I want to. The truth is, everyday, he is the first whom I think about when I wake in the morning, and the last that I contemplate before I retire at night. I love him with all my heart, and I don't care what anyone else says. I just want to be near him, always, but I fear he would not feel the same, that he would turn me away._

_I don't know if it is within your power to do anything to help me convey these feelings, but perhaps you have an idea of what I could do. If not, then I understand._

_Love,_

_Your friend,_

_Lucy Pevensie _

"I never intended to push you away, Lucy," he whispered as he returned the letter to her. As soon as she had accepted it and discarded it on the desk, he took a deep breath. "May I inquire as to why you did not send it?"

"I don't know," she whispered. "Perhaps I was afraid that he would judge me for having these feelings. Everyone else seems to judge them, even you."

"I never wished to do that, but my dear, look at us," he objected. "Look at me."

"I have," she whispered. "But this is not so much about what you are, it's about what I am. Why must my feelings for you be different because of what I am?" She asked as she lowered her head. "If I had known that the crown would have caused this much trouble, then I would never have accepted it. Tumnus, just tell me what is so wrong me loving you?"

"You are going beneath your worth," he said softly.

"No, I'm not," she cried. "It's just like that letter said. I am choosing the one who makes me feel as if I am whole and complete."

Tumnus could feel his cheeks flushing as she wound her arms around him, her body pressing up against his. He swallowed as he felt the electricity cursing through him. "Lucy, if we continue down the road we are journeying, then I would not be able to stop myself," he objected as he tried without success at putting some distance between them.

"If you want to walk away from me, Tumnus, then do it," she said softly, the hurt etched in her words. "But, I don't expect you to stop yourself, in fact, I don't want you to."

Tumnus looked down into the eyes of the young queen and shook his head sadly. "You would be willing to take such a chance with me?"

She nodded. "You are the suitor I choose," she said softly. "Will you at least have me?"

"Like you must ask me that?" Tumnus nodded slowly as he reached for her hand. As soon as she felt his hold on hers, she could feel the perspiration from his touch. This made her smile. "I won't ever leave you, Lucy." He whispered as he gently brushed his lips across hers. "Not ever."

She returned the kiss, but when it broke, she looked up at him. "In other words, we won't wake from this dream to find it over?" She asked.

"No," Tumnus shook his head as he reached over and wiped the last of her tears away. "It won't end. But did you know that when you told me you loved me, I felt it deep inside? It was as though you had touched my very soul with those gentle words."

"Do you truly love me?" She whispered.

He nodded. "More than my life, Lucy Pevensie." He began to weep softly. "More than anything."

She raised her head and looked at him as she began to kiss his face, her lips tasting the saltiness of his tears. "Then show me, Tumnus," she whispered. "Show me that you love me."

He raised his head and without hesitating, he pressed his lips gently against hers, his arms wrapping around her and holding her tightly. The kiss was sweeter and more special than anything he had ever known.

When it eventually broke, he swept her up in his arms and cast a quick glance towards the door. A gentle smile graced his lips as he carried her over to the bed and laid her gently among the silk sheets. Seconds later, he crawled over to where she lay and rested his body gently against hers. As he looked deeply into her eyes, he suddenly realized what it was that had compelled him to lock the door.

His heart had been right all along, he was now with his one true love, and knew that they would be together…always.

The End.


End file.
